COVER STAR

方芳芳&王菁菁 | 真摯情愛 優質生命 Sincere Love, Remarkable Life

知性主持人方芳芳,於事業如日中天之際遠嫁上海;王菁菁則歛起演員夢,成了宏泰集團長媳一肩扛起家務,兩人從備受家庭呵護的女孩,成為無私付出的母親一路關照彼此。在各自的精華歲月裡沉澱智慧,淘洗出溫潤澄淨的心靈,終能踏入第二人生,她們懷抱感恩傾力「台灣優質生命協會」回饋社會。午後暖陽灑落,《enya FASHION QUEEN》和姐妹倆一同分享以愛佐料的人生真味。

Intellectual host Fang Fang-fang was married to Shanghai when her career was on the crest of a wave, whereas Wang Jing-jing gave up her dream of being an actress, and became the eldest daughter-in-law of the Hungtai Group, who shoulders the responsibility of houseworks. The two ladies who grew under the care of their families have become selfless mothers, and have been attending to each other along the way. During their best years, the two have accumulated wisdom, and shaped into warm and pure mind, before entering their second life, where they became members of the Taiwan U-Life Association and give back to the society. Under the warm and vibrant sun in the afternoon, <enya FASHION QUEEN> joins the two ladies on a journey to explore a love-filled life.

如何接觸台灣優質生命協會?

方芳芳(以下簡稱芳):我大概高中畢業就進入演藝圈,出道的早也沒接觸過別的行業,自己很幸運有一段時間是觀眾都接受我的,然而時常回頭看一看,也許外界覺得演藝人員光鮮亮麗,只看到你享受的那一面,但其實很多資深藝人很辛苦,因為做表演如果沒紅過便賺不到錢。

時至今日我迫切的想回饋這圈子,參與台灣優質生命協會好多年了,剛好去年有個契機巴戈邀我接任2020年理事長,我欣然接下卻沒考慮到光頭銜就是非常重的重擔,但我勉勵自己「今天能做就試試看吧!」非常感謝巴戈和紀寶如,他們為照顧弱勢族群全然且無私的奉獻,那份真切的愛,讓我非常感動。

從過去幫忙晚會主持到今年接下理事長,我知道一個人的力量還不夠。菁菁是一個正能量女孩,和她相處幾乎沒有不開心,包括我們一起運動打高爾夫球時,只要球是往前飛她都喊好球,我就問菁菁可不可以幫忙,她是最爽快答應的。

王菁菁(以下簡稱菁):就像芳芳說的,我們一路走來大風大浪,經歷也算豐富,在心有餘力時多回饋社會是必要的,感謝芳芳想到我。雖然我在演藝圈時間比較短,但我也覺得真的演藝工作有很多人只看到外面的光鮮亮麗,其實熬夜、自己治裝很多的苦不為人所知,也許老了也沒能存到錢相當辛苦,所以我也能夠盡一點力,發揮我跟芳芳的影響力,很幸福能參加這個活動,希望大家和我們一起做好事。

參與過程中感觸最深的事件為何?

芳:我印象最深刻的是,有次去探訪一位阿伯他早早準備了烙餅和稀飯想款待我們,走進鐵皮屋,彷彿也看到自己兒時的眷村生活,阿伯用最熱情的招呼和我們同桌吃飯,而我正好在上海待了十多年,因為濃厚上海腔而鮮少開口說話的阿伯,也終於可以和我侃侃而談。

阿伯因為洗腎手部腫脹很難施力,當天發粉也沒了導致餅的口感不同,但是我卻突然想掉淚,人生像是面鏡子,在他的臉上我看到愛與熱情,我也希望自己能散播心中的愛與快樂,因為只有「愛」可以讓世界更美,只有「無私」讓世界更寬更廣。

隨著年齡增長或是身分轉變,對愛的體悟是否更加深刻?

芳:其實在生孩子之前我很討厭小孩,但當自己有了兒子就完全變了。以前一人在房裡睡覺總會開著門,因為我很怕鬼,但是陪伴兒子睡覺時,發現他也跟我一樣害怕,但我說「鬼只會找上壞人。」這種時候我不能怕了,身為母親我必須保護他。透過這些經歷更會知道,愛是一種能力,能夠無私且無我的去愛人是幸福的。

生命中有哪些重要時刻,令你深切感受到愛的存在?

芳:為人母後我更能體諒我母親了,她身為經紀人總陪著我到錄影現場,還不准我去Disco或是穿太露的衣服,後來才知道,那是因為母親對我特別重視,她給我的愛非常多,但是我後來待在台灣的時間太少。

小時候總把父母親的愛視為理所當然,也覺得是永遠都能唾手可得,如今他們不在了,才知道失去愛是多麼深刻的痛,痛徹心扉的痛!但也讓我感受身邊家人和朋友所給予我的愛是多麼珍貴而值得珍惜,非常感恩上天給我這美好的一切。

菁:我們身為女人本來就是比較感性的動物,在我得知母親得到肺腺癌後,便毅然決然從新加坡回來,我非常感謝自己做了這個決定,因為我陪伴她走過生病歷程,接下來就是公公也有一樣狀況,婆婆緊接著得到阿茲海默症,說真的,這些都還蠻熬煉心智的,但我們有滿滿的愛在裡面,珍惜能跟家人相處的光陰,有質感的傳遞愛跟接受他們的愛。

不少同齡女性也許半輩子奉獻家庭,反而遺漏自我,如何保有生命熱忱?

菁:我正在學習茶席花藝,總能在過程中得到平靜,年輕時也許會有較大的情緒起伏,不過到了一定年紀,就會很需要回歸寧靜和穩定。另外,我老公因為有糖尿病,不僅家裡吃的清淡,我也會陪著他打高爾夫球,得一直被陽光曝曬可能會長雀斑啊,他都看在眼裡,而且長時間待在球場,我們的感情昇華不少,影響到兒女因為感受到爸媽之間的愛,讓家庭的凝聚力更強了。

芳:我覺得持續學習很重要,除了之前接觸國畫,現在也著手西畫,可以花很長的時間浸淫在藝術生活裡,過去在上海也曾經上過蔣勳老師的中國以及西洋繪畫課,回到家則會聽有聲書,他有一副好嗓子,我有時連就寢都會播在耳邊。

相反老公在家很常問我要去哪裡,我就激勵他多學習新事物,老公也因此重新找回16年沒拉的小提琴,還找來鋼琴老師伴奏,雖然他拉的並不是很好聽啦(笑)。不過生命中不同的角色,都是「我」的一部份,我常告訴自己,衷於自我,盡情的揮灑並全然綻放自己。

能否用自己的人生經驗,勉勵同齡女性,勇於規劃後半人生?

芳:多愛自己,別為了孩子、家庭,什麼好看的衣服飾品都捨不得買,孩子長大自然會規劃自己的人生,除了把好好打扮自己,在累積人生歷練後,也能綻放最真最善最美的自己。

菁:我覺得過50歲了開始身體也有一些變化,沒辦法再像2、30歲一心想扛起整個家務,其實轉眼看時間也不見得多,像我的父親59歲就走了。

所以我會鼓勵大約這個年紀的女生要多愛自己,去學習曾經想接觸的領域,有點累的話去按摩,別捨不得給自己添加幾件漂亮衣服,在你合理範圍內偶爾跟姊妹們下午茶,有時候女性的排解是很重要的喔。

所以才有人說女人會長壽是因為我們有好姊妹,可以交流生活不順遂的事件,又增加了很多能量再勇敢面對,這是做女人最大的幸福。

能否談談愛必須推己及人。

菁:我是基督教,教義裡就有「捨己」,我因此能深刻感受,愛真的是在為別人付出時才會感受到。我也想分享偶像奧黛麗赫本,她曾說過「以真心待人,真誠最動人。」、「用善意對待世界。」、「不為小事抓狂、不滿、憤怒,不露出難看的表情。」

芳:我並沒有刻意去想「愛必須推己及人」,只是單純將心中的愛傳遞出去,如果愛是一道光,我願意將這一道光綻放。

協會希望描繪出台灣社會何種樣貌?

芳:協會其實是在幫助獨居老人、資深藝人還有智能障礙的孩童,當然我們現在還無法照顧到台灣各個角落,但透過大家持續耕耘努力,我們期待感染台灣能轉化為充滿愛的世界。

菁:我希望不只提供金錢挹注,也期待我們的行動會感化他人,願意一起以任何形式幫助他人。

生命最美好的姿態應該是什麼模樣?拍攝這日短暫卻美好,我們浸淫於方芳芳與王菁菁舉止裡的優雅,也在兩人溫潤的面容裡欣賞不斷綻放的華麗笑靨。不單是倚賴歲月沉澱,此刻的他們因為勇敢放下執著,而讓生命富有彈性,不論是回頭找尋遺落的熱情,或是往前探索未知領域,在愛自己的過程中,滿溢的能量足以感染他人,愛總能像漣漪一般,隨著付出向外擴散更在內心發酵。最美的姿態不用急於尋找,會在實踐裡獲得,好似兩人投注「台灣優質生命協會」以不同形式,為台灣社會逐步添上美麗樣貌。

How did you come into contact with the Taiwan U-Life Association?

Fang Fang-fang (hereinafter abbreviated as Fang): I entered the entertainment industry when I graduated from senior high school, and I wasn’t familiar with other industries since I made my debut early. I was lucky that the audiences took fancy in me for a period of time, though I often look back and realize that a lot of people only look at the outside of the celebrities and the luxurious side of them, without knowing that a lot of senior celebrities underFangt numerous challenges and hardships before their success now.

Now I am eager to give back to this circle. Having participated in the Taiwan U-Life Association for years, I was invited by Ba Ge to assume the president position for 2020, and I accepted the offer without much consideration on how heavy that title represents, though I told myself to just give my best. I am very grateful for Ba Ge and Ji Bao-ru, and I am very touched by their selfless devotion and genuine affection towards vulnerable groups.

From helping out at the gala in the past to becoming the president this year, I understand very well that the strength of one single person is simply not enough. Jing Jing is a positive lady, and its always a great time hanging out with her, for instance when we play golf together, she would always scream “good shot” as long as the ball flies forward. So I decided to ask Jing Jing if she is willing to help, and without a doubt, she said yes instantly.

Wang Jing-jing (hereinafter abbreviated as Jing): Like Fang Fang said, we have gone through a lot of things along our journey, and we feel that it is necessary to give back to the society from our relatively abundance experience, so I am grateful that Fang Fang thought of me. Despite my shorter period in the entertainment industry, I know that a lot of people only notice the flamboyant appearances of many celebrities, where the arduous processes behind these flashy outer shells are often omitted, and some of these celebrities are even unable to save up when they are old. Hence, I hope to do my part, and exert the influential power of both Fang Fang and I. I am thankful for being able to participate in this event, and I wish that doing so can prompt people to start doing good deeds.

What touched you the most during the process?

Fang: What I remember the most was the time when we visited a grandpa, who prepared pancakes and congee so early in the day to welcome us. When we walked into his tin house, it was like we traveled back to our childhood at the military dependents’village, and grandpa was very welcoming. I happened to stay in Shanghai for more than 10 years, so grandpa finally opened up and began speaking to me with his rich Shanghainese accent, which prevented him from speaking up for a long time.

Grandpa was having difficulty in applying force due to the swelling in his hands caused by dialysis, and that he happened to run out of baking powder on that day, so the pancake had a different texture, but I couldn’t help but started crying. Life is like a mirror, and i saw love and passion on grandpa’s face. I hope to spread the love and happiness within my heart, because only “love” will make this world a more beautiful place, and only “selfless” can expand this world.

Do you have a better understanding in love as you grow older or experience changes in identity?

Jing: I actually disliked children before, and the feeling completed changed after I gave birth to my son. I used to close my bedroom door whenever I sleep in the past because I am scared of ghosts, and I realized that my son does the same thing when he sleeps, that is when I would say to him”ghosts only haunt bad people”. I can no longer be scared, since I am now a mother who has to protect him. Having gone through things like these made me understand even more that love is a form of power, and that the ability to love selflessly is a blessing.

When have you particularly felt the existence of love during life?

Fang: I appreciated my mother even more after I became a mother myself. As my manager, she would always accompany to the shooting scene, and forbid me from going to disco or wearing revealing clothes. I knew later on that my mother did all that because she cares about me, and the love that she gave me was just profound, though I didn’t stay in Taiwan for too long afterwards.

We always take our parents’ love for granted and believe that it is something that we can always have, and it is only when they are no longer with us, we would finally understand that it is a heart stabbing pain, though it has allowed me to understand that the love from my families and friends is so precious, and I thank God for all these beautiful things.

Jing: Us women are emotional beings. After knowing about mother’s diagnosis of lung adenocarcinoma, I came back from Singapore immediately, which I am grateful for myself in making this decision, since I was there for her during the entire journey. After my mother, my father-in-law was diagnosed with the same disease, and my mother-in-law was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, which frankly is quite exhausting to the mind, but we have emitted our substantial amount of love to our families whilst accompanying them.

Numerous women of similar age have lost their real selves by devoting to their families for half of their lives. How do women maintain the passion in life?

Jing: I am currently learning tea ceremony and floriculture, where I often obtain serenity during the process, since it is necessary to return to tranquility and steadiness when you reach to a certain age, even if you have gone through larger emotional fluctuations when you were young. Furthermore, my husband has diabetes, so apart from following a clean diet, I also play golf with him, where it’s easier to get freckles from prolonged period under the sun, which he knows as well. The time that we spend together at the gold course has elevated our relationship, which has affected how our children perceive our marriage, thus leading to a stronger family cohesiveness.

Fang: I think that continuous learning is very important. In addition to attempting Chinese painting in the past, I have touched upon Western drawings, where I can emerge myself within arts. I participated in the Chinese and Western drawing sessions taught by Jiang Xun in Shanghai before, and I would listen to audiobooks at home, where the voice of Jiang Xun had helped me sleep even.

My husband always asks me where to go, and I would encourage him to try new things, which is why he has started playing violin once again after 16 years, who even asked a piano teach for accompaniment, though he isn’t the best at playing violin. However, the various roles in life are all part of me, and I always tell myself to be true to myself by exerting every last drop of energy.

Can you encourage women of the same age to be brave in planning for the second of their lives through your own life experience?

Fang: Love yourself, and don’t stop yourself from buying clothes and accessories for your children and families. Children will plan for their lives when they grow up, and you will be able to exert the best self after accumulating your own experience, in addition to making yourself pretty.

Jing: Your body will start to experience changes after passing the age of 50, where you are no longer able to shoulder all family affairs like you did when you were 2-30 years old. Time flies when you don’t notice it, and my father would be the best example, who passed away at the age of 59.

So I encourage women in this age group to love themselves, to learn in the fields that you once wanted to, go for a massage when you are feeling fatigue, and don’t be reluctant in buying new clothes for yourself, as well as go out and enjoy afternoon tea with your buddies, since female mediation is also essential.

This is why some people have said that good friends are the primary factor behind women’s longevity, who are able to exchange things in life with, whilst increasing energy to face upcoming challenges, which is the biggest happiness for women to have these good friends.

Can you talk about how one must consider others in your own place for love?

Jing: I am a Christian, and the doctrine talks about “selfless”, which is why I deeply feel that love can only be felt when you are devoting for others. I want to share some of the quotes from my idol Audrey Hepburn, who once said, “treat everyone with sincerity, as honesty is the most heartfelt quality”, “treat this world with benevolence”, and “do not irritate, resent, rage, and reveal bad looks for small things”.

Fang: I don’t necessarily think about how one must “consider others in your own place for love”, I just simply transmit the love within me. If love is a beam of light, I am willing for this beam of light to bloom.

What images of the Taiwanese society does the association want to depict?

Fang: The association helps with elders who live alone, senior celebrities, and children with mental retardation. We are obviously unable to attend all corners of Taiwan yet, though we hope to transform Taiwan into a place full of love through everyone’s continuous cultivation and efforts.

Jing: I hope that it’s more than financial help, since I wish that our actions will inspire others to help more people in any way possible.

What should the best posture in life look like? Although the day of shooting was abrupt, it was beautiful as we were enveloped by the elegance of Fang Fang-fang and Wang Jing-jing, while we appreciated the radiant and glistening smiles of these two gorgeous ladies. In addition to the condensation of age, they have laid down their stubbornness out of courage, which has infused elasticity in their lives. Whether it is retrieving lost passion, or exploring in unknown fields, the overflowing energy is adequately enough to influence others, where love will always appear as ripples and diffuse outward alongside devotion whilst ferment within. The most beautiful posture is obtained through implementation, which resembles how the two fine women dedicate themselves to the Taiwan U-Life Association, and gradually incorporate a remarkable look to the Taiwanese society through different methods.

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